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Something’s not right
Some mothers have that knack of being able to push our buttons and send us into a spiral @Snowie You certainly do not need thatwith everything else you are dealing with. I can fully understand you not wanting to talk to her about your past - it is hard enough dealing with that with our supports (or even ourselves) so not wanting to discuss it with someone that makes you feel like you do now I can fully understand you not wanting to talk to her about it. We need care and compassion to talk about those things - not anger, self-pity or resentment. It does seem like your mother has her own issues that she is not able to deal with and is turning that outward onto you. It is hard not to let it get to you when it is cyclic as well - you walk on egshells to avoid it but when you least expect it the manipulation and negative comments come. Definitely listening Hon - and vent away as much as you need - we are here for you 
