Lived Experience Forum

[Appleblossom]

@Lemonjuice

Love that through all the stress and pain you also have a sense of humour.

[Lemonjuice]

@Appleblossom You mentioned going to rehearsals. Are you into theatre? I thought about doing some acting but chickened out. I realised I get stage fright and freeze.

[Appleblossom]

I will post about it on a new thread later. I will tag you to it. I have to go to vollie work atm.

Cheers @Lemonjuice

@MoonGalis a lovely long term member, (Hi Bella. Hope you are alright) but may not post very often.  People use the site in the best way that suits their needs.  It takes a while to figure it out and not take things personally when it is just the ebb & flow of the forum members lives.

I am very non normal and normal all wrapped up together.  Yeah hormones can upset apple carts.

You can click on a profile pic and see other posts by the person and catch up that way too.

[Owlunar]

Hi @Lemonjuice

I was not offended either - in fact I went off-line and only got back this morning

My mother died three years ago and I am really glad I spent my time doing what was on my personal choice list - I never got on with my mother and at the end I could see she had a lot of regrets

Among other things I did an Honours Degree in English Literature - I have had a lot happen in my life - good and bad - and through all of it I am so glad I studied so much - it has helped me through everything even years after I graduated

So I guess if you live with your mother you do have some duty of care and if you spend most of the day cleaning the house then you have done your bit for the day and you are free - imo - to please yourself - maybe your mother is bored and lonely but it's up to her to fill that space in her life - after all - whatever you are doing and have done in your life it is your life and studying is fitting you up for whatever you choose

You can say as much or as little as you choose here - it's a pretty cool place to be a member

Dec

[Lemonjuice]

Damn library is shut! Not ready to go home. Just came down to a little river area...watching people fishing and putting their boats in the water. Normal people, doing normal things, enjoying their lives.

[Catcakes]

I’m also interested in whatever you’re prepared to share about the theatre @Appleblossom.
I have been involved myself in amateur theatre, not acting but props , sets and costumes.
My son acts and sometimes we go and see theatre together.❤️

[Appleblossom]

It is a street event with music acting etc but more of a carnival with a story sung at the end.  Cant tell more til it is over due to anonymity on forum as that would let people know where I was intending to be at a future time.  But it is great so I will share when it is over in a week.

Cheers @MoonGal @Owlunar @Lemonjuice @Catcakes

[Catcakes]

If it’s what I’m thinking @Appleblossom,
I would have loved to go but it’s my daughter’s birthday so we’re going out for dinner.
Hope it goes well and the weather is kind 🎭

[MoonGal]

I have Mother Issues too @Lemonjuice, oh boy do I...

I did a lot of work in psychotherapy this past year to set aside and step away from all the huge Button Pushes she is capable of eliciting either on purpose or by accident. It has helped alot.

One thing that has helped me a lot too is a little app for my android phone called "Breathe Easy" it has a little icon (you can change the look of it a circle, or heart, or square). Before I visit mother I sit in the car and do a few minutes of breathing concentrating on the app. I am still triggered and often forget to do it again when I get back in the car a squirrely mess, but hope I will start doing that (breathing afterwards!). She is in an aged care home now but I was her carer for years.

It is really tough living with someone who is not on your side, having to constantly be on your own side. I hope you can come home to yourself and be content there as often as you can. You mentioned the nano-second between being calm and going full monty do you have any tools int he toolkit to catch yourself before you fall?

I love libraries - they are a haven and the font of all wisdom and escape.

Anyways @Lemonjuice, I hope your day is going well and is as calm and clear as it can be and you get some lovely study time in.

Waves from a sunny place.

( PS: I live with BiPolar, cPTSD, Anxiety and OCD - have self-harmed in the past.)

[Lemonjuice]

@ Appleblossom It's a shame cause it would have been nice to go. It sucks that we can't just live in a world where people are loving and can be trusted. Good luck with it, break a leg as they say.