Lived Experience Forum

[TAB]

I think I can read people, its just that at work who stuck with whoever is there, then easiest path often seems to be leaving if they cannot be avoided.

Yes, people who I talked to only see it through their eyes. Anyway some places seem to have ok people there, whereas other are full of ah's and survivors who are only people who could work there @oceangirl 

[oceangirl]

Evening @outlander 

I agree it is very hard to take a step back. When I was younger I had no problem doing this. Back then I thought I was struggling, but in reality I was doing really good. 

You're right it is the mental side of things that really take its toll on us. I often take things to heart and that is hard thing to stop doing. We tend to do everything for everyone else but we neglect ourselves. 

I think I am able to give an example now- I was out to dinner the other night and it just really overwhelmed me and I couldn't say to the person that I had enough. She debriefed a work situation in which a patient/client recently passed away.I can't remember exactly what she told me but she told me how she was behaving and the last conversation she had with her before she was discharged from hospital. A few days after discharge she passed away. I will not go into details because I don't want to trigger anyone. 

And she was asking a lot of personal questions how much weight I had lost etc and how much more I wanted to loss. And then asking questions about my family and what they were doing. Just seemed to want imformation. This person has hurt me in the past by saying to me that I was a nobody etc. And the next breathe telling me otherwise. Because if I was say to her I was not coping too well or that I was depressed she probably wouldn't want to know. These types of interactions bother me and tend to stress me out too..

[oceangirl]

Sorry I am not good at explaining myself too well @TAB . Work is hard because you can't avoid them. Hopefully going in with a relax attitude and not caring might change the dynamic. You just have to stay ahead of the game and try to get them on your side. 

[oceangirl]

@Shaz51I am hoping she will be okay. Fingers crossed for her. I love her so much.

[TAB]

maybe I didnt read it right @oceangirl  I think i find some jobs are worth putting extra effort into if people there are being hard work and some are not

[oceangirl]

all good @TAB 

the extra effort is that because you're in a good work environment and the other environment you feel basically shit all the time.

[TAB]

pretty much. I did struggle with this recently and realised in the bad workplace situation, it was ultimately my perceptions that made me feel how I did. Anyway, I still had to leave. Thats the beauty of short term work. knowing its going to vanish soon @oceangirl 

[outlander]

hey @oceangirl
sorry I haven't responded till now, I mustve missed your tag before.

that is a really diffuclt situation. sometimes to me that feels like 'spying' as in they want to know all about you but honestly don't care .
when that happens to me I give short undetailed responses and turn the conversation back onto that person. people who are like that generally like to talk about themselves so its easy to turn the focal point from ourselves.

[oceangirl]

hey @outlander 

it gets under my skin and makes me really uncomfortable. they tend just care about themselves and their needs-very much self centred. I just need to make other friends and spend less time with them. how are you hon?

[outlander]

yeah I get that @oceangirl its sometimes hard to know who to trust and who just wants information sometimes.

hows things been for you? I think I read your having abit of a hard time atm?