Lived Experience Forum

[Zoe7]

@Faith-and-Hope @Maggie @Shaz51 @eth @Sans911 @Former-Member @Snowie @Appleblossom @greenpea @CheerBear and others reading or following along...

Spent the last couple of hours with my sister. She turned up at my door, dog in tow, crying. Her partner has once again been at it with the abuse and saying very nasty things - even threatening violence this time. She cried and talked for about an hour - the whole time I wanted to go around to her place and give some of it back to him (but I know that would make it 10 times worse also) - so I at quietly and listened. She is going to stay at the new house tomight but to do so we had to go around and get some things for her to take as well as her dog's bed and food. Her partner was very quiet to begin with - part of that was probably him feeling some guilt (I hope so anyway) and part was probably because I was there too. Inevitably the arguing started again but I'm sure he held back because I was there. I wasn't in the same room - quite frankly I did not want to even see him - but hear it unfold. My sister did not help the situation but I can also understand that she had to have her say as well. It is just an awful situation that I cannot see any end to 

Home now and with my fur babies - don't want to do much myself now - totally exhausted by everything as I am sure everyone would understand. There might not be much more done tonight - going to watch the cricket (if it doesn'tget rained out) then sleepyland for me. Plenty of Toby and Cat cuddles for me tonight - need to settle my own feelings with all this brings up for me also. So hard to see my sister go through all this and so hard to have those memories come back for myself. Definitely a night for extra self-care!

[Maggie]

Big hugs @Zoe7 . 💜💜💜💜

[Former-Member]

@Zoe7  That must be so hard for you. Im so sorry this keeps coming up. Yes please take time for some much needed self care. 😞💕🐶🐱

[Shaz51]

ohhh my sister @Zoe7 hugs

very understanable that you would be totally emotionally tired

thinking some self care tonight my darling with me and cat and toby by your side xx

very black up here now after being sooo hot and muggy today

we cleaned a house and mowed 2 lawns through lots of sweat

rain now and it feels like stormy weather

we are mowing a lawn for someone who is away -- we mowed today and the owners have arrived home today

mr shaz got a red flag for his licence , all fixed for another year -- ahhhhhh

me --- well the doctor was soo surprised with all the blood tests and scans done , he wondered why !!!!!

anyway the blood tests came back ok , the scan shows my kidney level is down a bit but the gallbladder, liver, panceas, to ok , the kidney was a little sad but ok

so he has ordered some more blood test in a months time and then i see he kidney specialist in march

@Faith-and-Hope, @Maggie , @eth , @Sans911 , @Gazza75 , @Meowmy 

[Mika]

Hi @Zoe7 

It sounds like your sister has been having an incredibly difficult time and she is very lucky to have you to support her.

Just thought I'd share with you the following support resource available for your sister which is available 24 hours a day:

1800RESPECT
Ph: 1800 737 732
Online Chat
www.1800respect.org.au

I am not sure if you are aware of this resource but they are a national sexual assault, domestic and family violence counselling service.  They are able to provide information on domestic and family violence, abuse, and other issues.  They can also put your sister in touch with people and services that can help her; and listen and work with her to come up with things that might help.  

I hope you have a super gentle and soothing evening with your sister and her dog.

Take care,

Mika

[Shaz51]

thank you @Mika 

yes @Zoe7  we are all here for you my sister , sending tender hugs

is your sister at the new house now xoxo

[Zoe7]

Some good news with your results @Shaz51 I hope the follow up tests for your kidney come back better than expected 

@Former-Member We both know how much these things can throw us - certainly not what I needed today. Going to stay connected here for a while then if the cricket does actually go ahead watch that - otherwise will probably head to bed really early and get through the night that way ...hoping seeing s I am so exhausted now I will sleep and those usual triggers will not prevent that.

@Mika Thank you but I do already know of 1800 RESPECT. Unfortunately my sister will not do anything about it  - I can't say anything either - she mentioned telling him she would call the police and when I suggested that it didn't need to be physical abuse to do so she turned on me ...I sat and took it because I knew how stressed and upset she was ...but doesn't make it any easier to deal with myself. Just a night to get through and I know she is safe and out of that environment for tonight at least.

[Zoe7]

Yes @Shaz51 she is at the new house with her dog so safely out of there. She will be there for a couple of days as the floor in the old house is being sealed ...so that is some relief. I will text her later and in the morning to make sure she is okay.

[Shaz51]

that is good @Zoe7 ,sooo glad you and your sister have each other , makes a difference xoxoxoxo

[Zoe7]

@Shaz51 I often feel annoyed (that is not the right word but can't think properly atm) that she comes to me to be her sounding board - especially as she never listened to me when I needed her. Her actual words were 'I don't want to hear this' so I never spoke about it to her again. We were so very close then too but that actually tore us apart a lot - I felt like I had no-one to talk to and nowhere to go for help - as when I summoned up enough courage to try I was shut down by the person that meant the most to me. I still carry that but also can't reject her ...I know how that feels and won't do that to her.