Lived Experience Forum

[Eucalypt]

@Eden1919 
Hearing your frustration and exhaustion. If you need support in the interim, please remember that there are a number of different helplines and crisis services that you can contact.

[Eden1919]

@Eucalypt  ok i know you didnt mean anything by it and that your intentions are good but PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE dont suggest ringing a crisis helpline or contacting those crisis services to me ever please I have said on countless occasions on here that those things are NOT helpful for me and are actually the opposite and make me feel WORSE. I do KNOW that this is not a crisis service and I am NOT looking for crisis support here I am simply here to have an outlet for my feelings and to be able to feel heard I am not here for cirsis support. also those very crisis services are a MAJOR contributer to my current problems and I am not saying other shouldnt use them but they are not good for ME. I get quite frustrated when people make this particular suggestion not because i think they meant to annoy/upset me but to me it feels like a bit of a "well talk to someone else because i dont want to deal with your problems" kind of thing and again i am aware you arent a crisis service but again that isnt why i am here and also the suggestion is kind of like well I am not unaware of those services and i have used them before and i wouldn't just keep going without having tried them and i know they arent for me so it feels like people are saying all will be fine if only i do contact them when actually i have already passed that step like i dont need someone to remind me that I am low on options because i am already very aware. I really dont mean to sound angry or mean but I am just getting really furstrated with the repeated messages from all sides (not just sane) but that those messgaes are unhelpful and dissmissive of my genuine concerns because no one seems to understand or try to undertand what is going on for me. and i know you may not know anything about me but i just dont hhave the energy to keep going over this same issue and it really upsets me.  

[Ochre]

Hey @Eden1919 

I really do hear you, and can understand how incredibly frustrating the suggestion of a crisis service is in this instance, especially when you have had direct experience and do not find them to be helpful. I do empathise and thank you for letting us know how it makes you feel. On the landing page of the forums where it says "SANE Forums do not provide crisis support or counselling. If you or someone you know is in crisis and needs urgent help call Lifeline on 13 11 14 or in an emergency call 000" a part of this ties into the need for us staff, as part of our moderation role, to ensure we're always exercising our duty of care by suggesting a more one to one qualified emotional support when your needs go beyond the peer support nature of the forums. I can understand this must be very challenging, and I do hear that emotionally it brings up a lot. Unfortunately this is a part of the role of both SANE moderators and community managers. You can e-mail us if you have any further questions of course, we're always here to listen and provide more explanation around what our responsibilites are Eden, if you need a little more context. (team@saneforums.org)

Ochre

[Eden1919]

@Ochre  you have still misunderstood me. honestly i am getting so frustrated you have not listened like everyone else and i am sure that wasnt your intention but you are still not understanding where i am coming from i said very clearly I AM NOT LOOKING FOR CRISIS SUPPORT ON HERE so there is NO NEED for you to post stuff relating to that i do not come here for that and i have said that on so many occasions. why is it ok for you (i dont mean you personally i mean sane as a whole) to ignore this and just repeat something from your community guidlines when you are then applying it in the wrong context and causing distress why is it more important for you to look out for not being sued than it is for you to be considerate of an individuals needs? like i am asking genuinely because i dont understand why a simple and reasonable request cannot be respected. I am not an new to this system and i am VERY aware of what crisis services are avaliable and when to use or not use them and regardless that isnt what i come on here for. couldnt you just ask something like "hey are you feeling like you need more than this right now?" or "are you ok to find the services you need" but not talk about those helplines there are so many other ways you could approach this instead of just saying that you essentially dont care and will continue to do whatever because you dont want to get in trouble. also again when i say 'you' in this i am meaning the sane organisation as a whole and its policies not the individual who replied as i am sure they were just folloowing what they were told to do and by goodness if this is against the 'guidlines' (which are incredibly vauge and applied inconsistently at best) then i'll be blowed because that is just causwallop.  

[Whitehawk]

Hi @Eden1919 

Thanks again for your feedback about SANE staff's duty of care requirement to offer you and other forum members sources of support as part of our moderation role.  Of course there is no requirement that you take up any of this support and you may well have your own support plan.  We are always keen to get members' feedback on the guidelines and to review that based on this. We do our best to apply the guidelines as moderators with all members and all posts in a fair and reasonable manner.  Although I can hear your frustration annoyance at this unfortunately unfortunately we are unable to not exercise this duty of care for all members.

I repeat our offer to you Eden. Please feel free to e-mail us if you have any further questions of course, we're here to listen and provide more explanation around what our responsibilites are, if you need a little more explanation. (team@saneforums.org)

warmest regards

Whitehawk

[Eden1919]

@Whitehawk  that is NOT an answer and i suspect if you havent given me one by this point then you wont be giving me one at all. you literally just repeated what was said before I am not a child or an idot and you dont have to pretend like i just didnt hear you because i did but you didnt hear me either so obviously this is not going to be resovled. 

[Owlunar]

@Eden1919 

I can hear your frustration - I know you have already made decisions about the kind of care you will or will not accept from professionals and the crisis lines - I have read your posts pretty consistently actually - never knowing how to reply because you already seem to have something in place yourself

But I had to learn myself that the Lived Experience Forum is a Peer Support Forum and the most effective help you - or anyone - can get is from those who have already lived through - already have experienced - how painful and how frustrating life and searching for adequate help can be

Yes - it's a hard road to follow and it seems to go on and on and it takes forever for things to get better - and I can hear that you feel like exploding - and you have a lot of problems in you way as you do your best to get by - 

I had to make a decision about posting here when I realised that this truly is for Peer Support -  I have to be honest in what I write - I need to think about the person I am writing to - and be open with myself and the other person and just hope that somehow, some day, it will help

You have been heard - the hard part is up to ourselves. I have to admit it's late at night and I remember reading the beginning of your thread last night - I will have to catch up with your story

Thinking about you - I guess I will think about you tonight - and I hope you can find some solutions to your problems - it's tough

All the best

Dec