Living with Ourselves

[Sophia1]

Yes @eudemonism 

How could I forget the sea..waves...sand...shells...rocks..pebbles...birds...tides...seaweed..smells..

I love water...

I love being in the sea...swimming...walking through the small waves as they ebb in and out...

love that  feeling of toes and feet sinking into the wet sand...

being buried in the sand used to be great..used to do that with my boys and they with me...

I like creeks and rivers but am petrified of snakes ...I also like to see what is at the bottom so I do not go into rivers or creeks..

clear water across rocks is fine...fascinating to watch also.l.

love the statement that you were going out to watch the clouds....made my day Eude...

actually the clouds here are very boring today..

warm weather..watered all of my pots and attempted to do some weeding but back started hurting...reminding me! over it...

how is your fig tree?

well I am tired from hour out in garden...virus zapping all of my energy..

husband very unwell but has still gone off to watch golf competition finals that he is normally in and mostly always won..he said that he will be in a cart...hmmm...

hope that you get to do something enjoyable today also...

as for spending money....

have you ever drawn up a simple budget? does not have to be serious...just include main necessities...then what is left put half aside to save...no matter how small...

just a thought..

bye for now..speak soon

Sophia 💛

[Sophia1]

Hello @Maggie 

Your having to wait so long and being handed from one person to the next is disgraceful, incompetence...

Why is it that often when we are at our worst our specialists are off on holidays?

I can't complain actually mine has most school holidays off, not all of them though, for obvious reasons..

Waiting to see a pain specialist for 10 months is also negligent in my book...the health system is always failing in at least one area...usually mental health even though the funding is coming through...

closing down of hospitals has not helped in the least...quite the opposite...

I feel your frustration and my own building up as I respond to you..

Yes I am surviving...

am bored out of my brain...

cannot go for a walk yet as virus is still zapping all of my energy...

did water my pot plants though..that felt good...running water is therapeutic for me..

Surviving? some days I feel as though I don't want to and then feel very selfish and inconsiderate...

have to acknowledge all of our feelings though don't we...otherwise we become even more unwell..

It is a pity that there is not a back up plan in place with your gp whilst pain specialist is away or even one of their colleagues...

Well one comfort ...very small...it is now 25 days in fact 24 and a half days...

good to see you about...I do understand as much as I am able to how hard life is for you...you do incredibly well..another warrior and survivor as I refer to exoplanet..

Sophia💜

[Sophia1]

Thank you for the beautiful flowers @outlander 

I hope that you are feeling better, read somewhere that someone had posted that you were not well..

Also that you are closing that door on other family members and looking after yourself first and foremost...

Hard ....becomes a definite usually when we leave it too late...

Sophia 💜

[Sophia1]

I know that I have posted this in the past..

I do love it though..

hope that it brings some calm, comfort to you all @eudemonism @Maggie @outlander @greenpea  thinking of you too pea..

@Shaz51 @Adge 

[eudemonism]

@Sophia1  i gave the fig tree a heavy prune during winter. And it's just started sprouting again . I've actually got two fig trees . However the other one is alot smaller and doesn't appear to be growing as fast as fig tree 1.

Yes i do budgets . Every fortnight . But there is always something else to spend money on. Apart from my smokes it all gets put to good use . Going to try and get new shoes . A decent clock . Block out curtains (for summer heat ) and a digital radio/stereo next pay . I'll be dipping into smokes money to get this stuff . And going without as a result. 

Yea. I was in a bind this morning. So i went for a drive to a small town close bye and sat on the jetty for awhile . Soaked up the scenary . Went for a quick walk along the beech . And then laid on the grass and did some cloud watching. It was a healthy distraction. It was somewhat therapeutic. Me dog came along also . 

When are you expecting your new house to be done?

[Adge]

Thanks @Sophia1 Lovely.

I'm having a hard time of it, sorry to say.

My brother C (who is blind & intellectually disabled) caught himself on fire, whilst cooking on Friday night.

He is in the intensive care unit of the burns unit, at a major NSW hospital (yesterday morning).

He is sedated & unconscious (apparently).

He has already had a skin graft operation on his neck, & then more this morning.

I tried to talk to my youngest brother about what’s happened to C – his response was to abruptly change the subject & refused to talk about it.

That’s exactly what he did (his response), when Dad died.

People on this forum have been really nice - my only supports at the moment.

So tired - neighbour's boom boom speakers went all last night (couldn't sleep), & then all through today (when trying to rest).

Kind thoughts to you. I'm gona lie down now.

Adge

[greenpea]

@Sophia1  Hey Sophia1 that is a beautiful photo :). Maybe a bit too many people for this little green pea but the water looks so blue and the sand so clear it is lovely.  How are you going beautiful lady? I hope life is treating you kindly and with care. Love peaxxx

[Maggie]

@Sophia1  I can hear your frustration. When pain, physical and mental continue, it wears us down, wears us out. I understand completely when you say there are times you don’t want to go on, it takes tremendous courage to do that. If we knew how long and hard the journey would be, many or most of us might not have taken that first step. Warriors we all are, no doubt in my mind.

The problems I’m having is with housing. That’s been going on since last December. They keep changing their story, and asking me to repeat mine.

As for the specialist, he’s the only one doing all medical needs at the general hospital. Even Politicians get it wrong. Some days I have fight in me, other days I have none.

Spring is here, and blossom and bulbs are amazing. Oh for small miracles everywhere.

I do like the pic you posted. Something about water. Read a book about its healing powers and frozen crystals recently. Negative words distort growth in plants and the formations of water crystals.

You are doing the best you can. You are good enough. 💕💜💕💜

[Sophia1]

Dear @Adge 

That is alarming news..

I hope that he is in the best of care and feels some level of pain relief soon.

I do not know much about the treatment other than there are different stages according to the degree level of the burns..

Perhaps tomorrow you could ring the hospital , identifying yourself as his brother who lives interstate and ask for updates..or you might already have this in place... 

Are you able to make an appointment with your gp or therapist to discuss what has happened...have extra support..even extra medication temporarily if needed...

I believe that it would be beneficial for your own health to be able to open up about this as it is also triggering how you were treated by your family when your father passed away..

Also very strange how your family are treating you...

then many families do this to certain members...

my mum is doing it to me again..

Continue to open up as much as you feel comfortable in doing, Adge..also on a thread where you have made connections and feel supported.

Thinking of you and feeling for you

Sophia💜

[outlander]

Has been a hard day @Sophia1 but i love the pic. It is lovely, wouldnt it be nice to be there
💜❤