Paranoia at work

[Sandwich]

Looking for some advice.... I have diagnosed schizophrenia but symptoms have been completely managed by meds and relatively low stress lifestyle for over 20 years. I recently started a new job - 27 hours per week - it's a nice environment in community development, however after all these years, I'm having symptoms resurface, specifically, paranoid thoughts that people in the workplace are all talking about me constantly. It's causing me a lot of anxiety, even though at the core I do like the job. Do I quit the job, to return to a lower stress lifestyle of family / domestic life (and feel a bit bored and unstimulated) or keep at the job? I have consulted my psychiatrist who has put me up on meds for the first time in decades, hasn't helped so far. Feeling torn. 😞

[Macey]

Hi @Sandwich  and this sounds a difficult situation of feelings.

I don't think anyone can tell you what to do with your life it's your life to make as good as you are able. I still wonder if you could try testing these intrusive thoughts as they arise ? And if you think affirming the reality of these moments would help like, when paranoia thoughts arise but instead you reinforce something positive with yourself like "I like being here" or "I'm doing a good job right now" ?

Coz maybe it's a matter of overcoming detriment thinking with secure sovereign reminders that you are master of your feelings and even if feelings come with trouble thoughts, you can open a window and let them keep on going right on out of your beautiful space..

That's what I do with house flies. 

I'm just wondering

[tyme]

How have things been for you @Sandwich ?

[Sandwich]

Thank you so much for checking in @tyme. I told my work I was having sleepless nights and have exhaustion and they kindly allowed me 10 days off before the summer breaks. Now I need to ponder whether I stay or go over the break. I feel much better not in the job. Perhaps it's too many hours, too much for my little fragile soul.

[tyme]

It's important to do what's right for you @Sandwich . Whilst not working can help you recover, sometimes work can bring routine and accountability. 

Perhaps the work-rest balance needs to be modified?

Please take care and look after yourself.

[Sandwich]

You're very right @tyme.... This is exactly what I think needs to be amended - the balance. Thank you for the reminder and investing a comment to help a stranger. It means alot!

[tyme]

Any time @Sandwich ,

We all deserve it. Sometimes, people just need a little nudge in the right direction.

All the best with it my friend!