Looking after ourselves
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04-01-2022 12:44 PM
04-01-2022 12:44 PM
BPD adult daughter
My adult daughter is an undiagnosed person who exhibits BPD traits.
She has not spoken to us for over 3 years, although her husband and 3 teenage children contact us regularly.
At Christmas her husband and 3 children visited us (she refused the invite) and we exchanged gifts.
Within 2 days she had returned some of the gifts in a garbage bag, and had cut up the gifts we had given her, and left them at our letter box. (It appears she may have used a sharp implement) They were seen by neighbours.
This is the second time she has "blacklisted" us. The last episode lasted 3 years.
I am worried as her behaviour seems to be more aggressive.
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05-01-2022 01:36 AM
05-01-2022 01:36 AM
Re: BPD adult daughter
...discuss the issues with her husband, possibly directing things to her family medico gp for help,
..search for your local BPD group and seek their advice
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05-01-2022 07:33 AM
05-01-2022 07:33 AM
Re: BPD adult daughter
Thank you for your advice.
All of the suggestions have been already done, many times.
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05-01-2022 11:36 AM
05-01-2022 11:36 AM
Re: BPD adult daughter
Morning @Littlerob1 and welcome to the SANE forums
What you describe with your daughter sounds quite painful for you all and I think it's brave of you to share your story here with us and to reach out. I'm wondering whether you've been able to get any professional support for yourself? It sounds like these interactions are quite concerning and sometimes it helps to have someone on your side to help navigate through this.
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05-01-2022 08:01 PM
05-01-2022 08:01 PM
Re: BPD adult daughter
Pretty common with BPD to have ongoing rage against someone. I have seen it and it's not the fault of the person who has been blacklisted. I think that you can't change her behaviour but I love how you're trying to keep the relationship going with the others. Hopefully one day she might seek help and maybe with mediation things can improve. In my situation I've tried to work on grieving the lost relationship, forgiveness in my heart and compassion for the person who has done this to me. It's an ongoing journey
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06-01-2022 10:12 PM
06-01-2022 10:12 PM
Re: BPD adult daughter
When and how did it start @Littlerob1 ?
Do you remember what the initial issues and signs where that lead to her actions towards you?
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08-01-2022 07:01 AM
08-01-2022 07:01 AM
Re: BPD adult daughter
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08-01-2022 07:03 AM
08-01-2022 07:03 AM
Re: BPD adult daughter
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07-02-2022 04:17 PM
07-02-2022 04:17 PM
Re: BPD adult daughter
hello @Reft21 , @ISFAF , @Littlerob1 , @AussieRecharger , @Rhye
we have a copy of thread that maybe helpful
Topic Tuesday // Supporting loved ones living with BPD // Tuesday 25th January, 7pm-8:30pm AEDT--- this is a only to read now thread but is interesting
Parents Supporting Unwell Adult Childrenis another thread to have a look and have a chat