Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[nashy]

Hey @csutak40 yes it can be a bit tricky at times, we are currently working on ways to do webinars but unfortunately there will be no zoom tonight. If you are on a laptop hit refresh on your browser and new questions will appear from me 🙂 Feel free to reply to ask more questions or share your insight, or read along with others.

[nashy]

@FindingStrength Wonderful to see you!

[Shaz51]

hello @FindingStrength xx

Hello @csutak40 , our guess speaker @Bron is going to ask questions and you can share and read as we go along 

[nashy]

Alrighty everyone let's quick off with Question One on Setting Boundaries as a Carer -

If you are a carer or loved one - What are some challenges you have found in boundary setting with loved ones struggling with mental health issues? 

@FindingStrength @Shaz51 @Former-Member @Bron 

[Bron]

Guilt arises when carers assume responsibility for the person they care about, or when they believe that they are to blame for the situation in some way. They may not be clear of what is their responsibility (their own thoughts, emotions and behaviour) and what is not.

[luckymeaunty]

Finding the balance between compassion for their struggles & maintaining boundaries once set.

[Former-Member]

yes balance is the hardest bit, agreed @luckymeaunty 

[FindingStrength]

I have struggled with worry/fear that my loved one will have an extreme reaction to a boundary - which has happened. I also don't enjoy being the recipient of loud anger.

[nashy]

Very powerful reflection @luckymeaunty thank you for sharing, certainly resonates with me the notion of balance. How do you go about managing that conflict of sustaining compassion but also looking after yourself? 

@Bron Thank you for this, sometimes I see a common theme of self-blame here on the forums amongst our carer community. It's important we are really gentle with ourselves in the process of caring for those living with complex mental health, and empower ourselves to take a break at times. The ol' oxygen mask on yourself before others on the plane rings true!

[Former-Member]

@Pearl146  @SoS  you might be interested in joining this online discussion.