Lived Experience Forum

[BlueBay]

Pls hang in there @Angels333  you deserve to be here and live a life full of love and happiness. I don't know much about you. But pls reach out. 
csn you think of something thst you can do to alleviate the intensity if sh. Like listening to music, go fir a walk. Meditation. 
Pls take care 

I do understsbd. I've had sh thoughts for a while.  
❤️❤️

[Angels333]

Thanks @BlueBay , I do have plans to go to the gym later today.   I just have to wait for the washing machine to finish.    And I had a flat tyre yesterday, son 2 changed the tyre and put on the spare, so I have to get that fixed.    Anything to distract hey?  I can't go into the details as it's too triggering and simply not appropriate but all I can say is even with distractions it still happens.   My best option is to go out of the house.    

[Maggie]

@Angels333  Can you get out of the house, a coffee, sit in a park, walk around the block. I know how strong the urges are believe me. Take care as best you can. 💕💕💕

[Tortoiseshell]

Hey @Angels333, 

It sounds like things are really challenging right now. I'm sorry to hear you're experiencing strong urges around self-harm and thoughts of suicide at times. You mentioned feeling your mental health has been worse this past month. Have you had the chance to let your supports know? 

I can hear you are putting plans in place to distract you, and getting out of the house sounds like a good plan. I am also sending you an email to check in. 

Take care,

Tortoiseshell 

[Molliex]

Oh @Angels333 , I am really sorry to hear you are battling again.

Is there another health professional you can go and see or get an appointment with? It may not be the best idea to wait until after your tests and your pdoc appointment. Please reach out for help, because you deserve it. 

I'm glad to hear you have some things to distract you. Keep trying x

[Angels333]

Thanks for the support @Molliex @Tortoiseshell @Maggie  @BlueBay 

I actually went and woke up my kids 16 and 18yrs   I'm sitting with them now.    It has been a terrible morning and the urges are still there.    But I have a plan to go out in half an hour.

Thanks for the help.

[Owlunar]

Hi @Angels333 

I really don't know what SH and SI is like but I think it would be humiliating when the therapist told you that it was like an addiction would be horrible. Then thinking he may be right - that would be uncomfortable - 

Did having this conversation help you at all? After some time has passed do you still feel he is right? - I actually can't imagine but from the little I know about SH it does relieve some of the tension that builds up with some kinds of MI - but I guess on some kind of imaginary "Helpful - Not Helpful Spectrum" it's not good and it would be better of course - if you didn't

But there are the feelings that cause this - that's the subject to discuss with him I imagine. Do you get to talk about this in your DBT sessions?

I hope you are feeling better now - I'm glad your kids are there - my wish for you is that there is some easing of your tensions and this will pass

You are having a rough time atm

Sending hugs

Dec

[BlueBay]

I do hope going yo the gym helps @Angels333 

I just went for a quick walk eith my granddaughter in her pram. 
at least I got out of my chaotic house for a little while. 

[Angels333]

Hey @Owlunar you articulated exactly how I feel,  I was humiliated.   But yes I do think he is right.     I did some research on SH and addiction and there's a  lot of evidence to say there's a connection.    I see my psychologist on Monday and I'll ask his opinion. 

My real issue is I'm off my medication and my Psychiatrist won't increase it until after I see a cardiologist.   I really do believe it will get better when that happens. 

[MDT]

@Angels333
Never apologise 🙂
🙏