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Re: Dissociative Identity Disorder Carers?

Ta @Former-Member. 🙂

Not too bad here. Older Daughter has had some health hiccups/hospital presentations since her surgery. Problem of it being impossible to know if they're genuine or "unconsciously manufactured". She rang us last night with a list of symptoms and online advice to get medical attention... only attention available at that time of night is hospital emergency, if she went in there, they would have done a COVID test, which would mean she couldn't get a taxi and therefore would have no way to get home, and they don't want people sitting around the waiting room if they're "possible positives".... so we advised her to see how she went and maybe hold off until morning. Haven't heard yet what happened, I presume she didn't go in, Hubby is currently transporting her to a pre-arranged swab test, needed before her new carer can attend her home... so I guess I'll find out when he gets home.


Am a bit concerned that the carer who has been assigned to her is very young. Not yet 20. That means very "early career". This mostly concerns me because our beloved daughter can be very challenging and confronting. I hope the lady in question has very good senior back-up, and that she doesn't get scared away from being a carer. SH/SAs are fairly inherrently confronting. (The run of "good weeks" is still continuing in that regard, so the longer that remains the case, the better.)

Day One of the second round of learning at home for Younger Daughter. Am hoping that she's starting from a better base level state of mind this time and will get enough of the work completed. Last time almost nothing happened schoolwork-wise, but the time out really did help her into a better position emotionally. So I sort of don't regret it...but it means it might be a struggle getting her passed into Yr. 11.

Ummm... well stocked food-wise for staying at home, due to an ongoing several weeks' worth pantry. Which is what I've done for years anyway. ("Farmers' Pantry". 😛 ) Hoping to do a trip tomorrow to get animal food and cement for Younger Daughter's "teenage cubby" project- and bonus, she took my suggestion of asking her design/woodwork teacher if that could count as an assessment task, and he said yes. Smiley Very Happy So as long as she documents what she's doing, some of her at home work will be doing something she really wants to do.

Mum and Dad's aged care home is still safe and sound, in a "low case count" region but nevertheless, they've run ahead of the official recommendations and closed to visitors as soon as things started escalating elsewhere.

I'm a bit up and down myself, but trying to ward off the "downs" by getting out into the garden, even if I'm not quite in the mood... because eventually, it works. As well as achieving something out there, it's me-time, when I can think, pray, whatever.

Re: Dissociative Identity Disorder Carers?

How are things going @Smc ?

Re: Dissociative Identity Disorder Carers?

hello and hugs @Smc 

how are you today and how is your family HeartHeart

@Former-Member, @Determined 

Re: Dissociative Identity Disorder Carers?

Thinking of you here also @Smc 

Re: Dissociative Identity Disorder Carers?

Hello all.

All's basically quiet. My Mum and Dad are tracking steadily. Older Daughter has had some medical-ish issues, but the no-SH run has continued. Given that is one of the more disturbing presentations of her MI, that is a huge relief for us.

She did ring up a few days back and told me she'd been battling a SI the previous night, and the way that brought up my stress levels/sent down my mood brought home how much this matters to us. A lot of the other stuff we can deal with or adjust to one way or another, but I don't think it's ever possible (or desirable) to normalise the life threatening behaviours.

She's still looking for a rental that she can move into on her own, has applied for some but hasn't had any acceptances yet. This has been part of her motivation to stop the SH- the fact that repeated ambulance and/or police attendances could make her an undesirable tenant. Some of her rental options have looked do-able, some were not at all practical. (Both a small but locally important heritage listed cottage and a room in an aged care home were ones I talked her out of. For very different reasons.) She's been checking with me about the assorted options, and I've been looking them up on real estate pages plus Google Earth and talking through their pros and cons with her. And bit by bit we're finding "missing" bits of knowledge, such as filling her in on the need to have money for connection fees for services, and the fact that, in all fairness and for practical reasons, she may need to be paying rent for two properties for a brief time.

On the topic of "missing" knowledge- she's coming around to the idea that an autism test may be worthwhile. The $$ is an obstacle though. It's four figures, and doesn't tend to attract a medicare rebate due to the therapeutic options being mostly centred around kids, not adults. Logic being, if a test doesn't lead on to treatment, what advantage in funding it? So she'll make enquiries, and we'll feel our way forward from there.

Meanwhile in this relatively quiet space, I'm trying to reclaim some of our household chaos. There's all sorts of maintenance/improvement jobs that can't currently be done because there's too much clutter in the way, and I sooo much want to start making some headway!

Re: Dissociative Identity Disorder Carers?

@Determined @Shaz51 @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope ...

Have just gotten off the phone from taking the plunge and ringing our official state carer support site.

We were registered with a carer support agency years ago, while Older Daughter was still living at home. When she moved out, and I lost my official "carer" status, we dropped off their list. And there's been all sorts of changes in the interim, a few one off carer support related visitors and stuff, but because she's officially self managing, we've been "off the radar". And we haven't had the energy to go chasing for support.

So, the lady on the phone was honestly very nice and supportive and empathetic, and she's passed on my details to the local carer support provider, but I'm feeling kinda yuk now. Simple questions like what's our daughter's diagnosis were impossible to answer, because she scatters all over the DSM, with "characteristics" from several different diagnoses. (And her long-time-ago diagnosis of DID actually looks fairly unlikely by now, so this thread's title is a bit misleading...) But she needed to tick some kind of "diagnosis" box before passing on my details.

And then the question of what kind of help was I wanting. Ummmm ????? We've spent so long either winging it alone or getting our own supports into place (psychologist... SANE forums... understanding friends...), and also the thing that we've been the ones giving help. So I couldn't find an answer for that question either.


Sometimes the support we've needed has been advice in really critical, life threatening circumstances. Sometimes it's been needing someone in the middle of the night who might be able to step in when Older Daughter's been refused admission into the psych unit, but she's in a really bad state of mind. Sometimes it's just been the simple thing of how do we get a few days break when, despite being physically hundreds of k's away, we're as close as a phonecall in a crisis... and bang goes the respite. Sometimes it's been the problem of not being able to be in two places at once when my parents have needed us there, or when a crisis has blown up while we're up at their end. Often it's been the difficulty of trying to get breathing space for our Younger Daughter so she's got some vague possibility of passing into the next year level in school. Couldn't think of any of that while I was on the phone though.

Hate running into those mental brick walls, brain just closes down and doesn't want to play. Smiley Frustrated

Re: Dissociative Identity Disorder Carers?

Thinking of you @Smc 

Re: Dissociative Identity Disorder Carers?

She broke her "no SH" run last night. But she went a bit over 13 weeks. Hoping she can pull back out and not return to the old compulsive pattern.

 

Re: Dissociative Identity Disorder Carers?

@Smc  🙏

Re: Dissociative Identity Disorder Carers?

@Smc   🙏

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