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Re: not feeling good

A very restless night with another headache. 
I'm tired emotional and anxious. 
wish this headache would go away 

I'm going to take some meds for it and go fir a short walk. It's a beautiful morning. Might be the last nice day for a while. 
Wishing everyone a nice day 

thinking of you @Former-Member @Zoe7 

@Maggie @Owlunar @Shaz51 @Faith-and-Hope @Molliex @MDT @Angels333 ❤️❤️

Re: not feeling good

I hope you have a nice day also @BlueBay . It’s beautiful here too. I hope you enjoy you walk. 💙💙💙

Re: not feeling good

Hi everyone 

@Maggie @Owlunar @Shaz51 @Faith-and-Hope @MDT and others

 

more headaches. Saw my doctor this morning. Results came back good. But I've got biliary colic which is why I'm having psin.  I mentioned thst I'm very tired as I'm not sleeping and my anxiety is very high. 
I cried when I saw him because I told him I can't talk like this at home. 
he said I'm heading down again and doesn't want to see me in hodpital. 
I'm really sad. I'm not wanting to do anything. 
it's raining here. It's pjs day today so I'm making soup for dinner then I'm going to have a sleep. 
I also feel like I'm coming down with a cold. 
I sent a text to wirk saying I can start next Wednesday. But if I get sick sgsin I think I'll tell her if she can't keep my job then it's ok. I feel bad thst she's holding my job at this very busy time. 

hope you all are doing ok. It's a crazy world   The shops are closed. The streets are very quiet. There's just no one around. It's a weird feeling. 

Re: not feeling good

Aw @BlueBay 

 

That's not good - I can hear you are going down - this is just a question but would you feel better if you were in hospital again? Would you feel protected from the virus there? The world is a tough place right now - I had some emails from my cousin recently - several - and I responded last night - things are tough overseas too.

 

What is the best thing you can do  right now? Going back to bed sounds good today - personally I had a good night's sleep - I think the heavy rain helped

 

I have been thinking about your situation - having so many people in the house is a huge problem and I am wondering if you can write down what it is you would or rather - need - to say to them. I know you are supposed to be perfect for them - I do wonder about that because I am far from perfect.

 

Still thinking - two phonecalls later - I think it's important that you do tell your family how you really are. - you would like them to understand I am sure and that's the only way they can know and sheesh BlueBay - I know that's hard for you. I read a lot of these messages from other people and I know it's hard to explain mental illness to people. 

 

Just think about it - I hope you can - I'm just making a suggestion

 

I  am okay - today seems to be the day I get distractions - there are days nothing happens - but I am okay - I am used to being alone. I think about you a lot - I am wondering if it would help if you wrote down the things that you a struggling with and have a list for things you can do something about an things you can't and see how it looks and let me know - let us know. I do hear you

 

But yes - there are a lot of things happening right now we have no control over - I know you feel sad and uncertain about starting a new job. I hear you.

 

You are not alone - it is an uncertain world right now

 

Dec

 

 

 

Re: not feeling good

Hi @Owlunar 

always nice to hear from you and your replies. 
To be honest with you I'm scared of this new job. I'm scared of failing getting things wrong, getting into trouble. 
I thought just this morning - do I look for pharmacy wirk because that's what I've done for the last 10 years. 
reg hospital - I would love to go bsvk in. Hibernate there. But I don't know. I'm speaking to my psych via phone in two weeks time. If I'm still like this I will speak to him about hospital. 

I'm laying on the couch with a movie on. But I think I'll have a nap soon. Before all the boys come home. Little A is asleep so it's quiet. 

I really struggle with communication with hubby and kids. I need to learn to be more spoken. This has been my  problem for a very long time. 
whst can I do for now? Keeping up with my regular walking.  Eating healthy. Colouring in. Try to stay positive which I know is very difficult for everyone at this crazy time. 
I need to keep in contact with my doctor who has been amazing. 
good idea about a list. I will write done things down. 
Glad you're ok. My parents spoke to dads sister in Italy and they're ok for now but very scared. It's been terrible there. 
Thankyou for thinking of me. That makes me feel wanted. 
Some days I don't even get a Thsnks for dinner from anyone. 
it's annoying and frustrating 

 

better go and have a sleep. I'll chat later. Xxxx

Re: not feeling good

Let's see @BlueBay 

 

What I do know about is that families may not thank anyone for dinner - the wife and mother has always provided it and what's the big deal? - it's soul destroying.

 

My ex-h used to stare at his dinner as if it was tainted and eat it slowly and silently. Early in married life I asked him if he liked it and his reply stuns me to this day when I think of it. He told me if he told his mother he liked something it would be his dinner for days on end - egad!! - Got it - I only cooked for him because I was cooking for myself and the children - but when they were gone things fell apart - our marriage was over and I was so relieved.

 

Families can be so annoying and take so much for granted. You seem to be having super-dose of that. It is important to find a way of making yourself heard though - and this is difficult because they don't want to listen. I can tell you this though - when you are frustrated and angry they know something though and react in various ways as you have mentioned -

 

I don't envy you in your position though you might find mine challenging. I am glad I am alone - I can do what I choose when I choose. I have the TV on a lot of the time so I can keep in touch with what's happening and unexpectedly I had three calls while I was writing my previous post to you. One of them was my daughter and that was good to have. Her hours at work are being cut - they are providing their services on-line and I guess that has limits too. She's okay

 

Of course you are wanted - never fear about that - there is no need. I am being to gather that people MI to have concerns about that and I read something important about MI and people fearing they are not good enough - this was somewhere else on-line - it's not true thought - everyone has the right to be here - regardless - and I value you too.

 

There's no need to worry you won't be able to do the work in a bakery - have you asked what you will be expected to do - if you are serving then you are used to doing that - you would have to be qualified to bake the bread so they won't expect that  I think you will be okay and I would take that chance if things were different

 

Keep in touch - I needed time out but I am okay and certainly have the time to chat - I hope you got a sleep - that is the best thing - and take one thing at a time - worry about stuff solves nothing - perhaps I have had longer to learn that - I am not sure when I stopped worrying about things

 

I thought I would just tell you - I have decided to visit my cousins overseas when all of the chaos is over - the thought of flying over the Pacific from Melbourne to Vancouver is daunting by I have decided to do it - it's just the thought of all that ocean - ocean - ocean - but it would be worth it to see them again after so long

 

You will be okay - I am sure of it - as much as anyone can be sure of anything right now

 

Dec

 

And yes - you might be able to get a job in a pharmacy because you are qualified and experienced for that but you can have one day a week somewhere for now if you can manage it

 

 

 

Re: not feeling good

Hi @Owlunar 

I managed to get out for a short walk around the block. It was nice cool but nice. 
dinner made and I did have a nap this afternoon. I felt better after thst. My psin in my stomach is still not good. I'm going to take some meds to see if it helps. 

Thst will be so nice to see your cousin. 

i haven't told you but my D ex has a new partner already. After two weeks he's met someone online and she moved in with him while my daughter had her things there!!!   My D was and still is very angry. Not even two weeks. And he had the nerve to ask my D if little A can meet her!!! What the!! 
I was angry and said to my D thst he had no respect for her snd how does he know after two weeks that she's the right lady to introduce A to her. 
gosh I was angry. So my D said she felt it was too early. I've been teally worried about this whole thing with him. 
my D and I went to the place and took everything thst was hers. 
My D said she's glad she left. Best decision. I always worry about what if he takes her. You just never know Whst he could be thinking. 
Gosh so much on my mind. 

Re: not feeling good

See @Owlunar  no appreciation from anyone at home 😢

I put the dishwasher on this morning but didn't unpack it. I forgot. Plus I had a sleep. Is that so bad??

hubby came home and D snd I went gir our walk. He then says "oh don't worry A I'll clean your mess" yo which I knew it was a dig at me for the dishwasher. I said don't worry I'll go it later. 

just had dinner snd sons were clearing the table and hubby pipes up snd says "oh I did the dishwasher" I turned around and said "so ehst do you want a badge" then I said "oh well I washed the clothes and cleaned the house"!!!'

he had to gloat that he did the dishwasher. 
Another thing - I used the blender stick snd I think one of the boys put it away in the pantry but not in correct spot. OMG hubby saw it and went off saying "oh who did this why is thst here" I turned around and said "just put it back in the right spot do you have to carry on"

 

I'm now sitting alone on couch. Little A sbout yo have a bath. 

Think I need a early night. 

 

Re: not feeling good

Hi @BlueBay 

 

I do see - you are not apprecated at home - and it's no time for Huffnpuff to act out his OCD - you did the right thing imo - keeping your cool - I really do hear that

 

I posted what I thought you and your D could do about her ex-partner and these things are never easy - I lost my connection though - darn

 

It is  not sensible or easy for A to meet a stranger her father just met on the internet - ah - now you can use the social spacing to your advantage - it's no time for A to meet a total stranger - and she is too young to understand the situation - so your D can say "no" about this because of coronavirus.

 

And it is time for your D to see Legal Aid - I know no one wants the law involved but refusing the ex-partner may aggravate the situation

 

This is something to be really concerned about - I would be too - he doesn't seem like responsible father material - it's just doesn't sound like it - anyway - 

 

I think it's important for D to get legal advice - and it really is a messy situation

 

Try and keep calm - things are always easier then but feeling uneasy - yes - I get that

 

Dec

 

Re: not feeling good

I've got this huge fear of psnic

fear of losing it 😢

my anxiety is extremely high 

I need to relax but can't 

 

is there anyone around??

 

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