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kenny66
Senior Contributor

Moving, maybe?

I had a bit of an issue week before last that put me into care for a few days.

Nothing dramatic, but the outcome is that my psych and health team would like to be in a more controlled environment and particularly in the city and not out north on the beaches where I am out of town.

They think I am having a few too many "unsupervised" episodes and I am running a bit wild. Problem is that I have a lot of fun out here and being unsupervised is the best thing about it.

Also it don't matter if I am different here because the local indigenous people and others couldn't care less and treat me fine.

I do sometimes do off the cuff things like catch the train to the next town 500ks away or disappear into the bush for a couple of days but its not like I am going to get eaten by a crock or great white shark or anything like that. I can tell when I need help and go to the cops or hospital. 

Also I think in my head that it will be the first step towards me ending up in some sort of institution.

Its Saturday night late and no one to talk to so I wanted to put down my thoughts just to get them out.

I don't want to move -I don't like change. Maybe I will feel better about it in the morning when I have had a think about it. Thanks

 

kenny

10 REPLIES 10

Re: Moving, maybe?

hey @kenny66 

That sounds like a bit of a predicament..... i understand that the teams, are obviously a little concerned, regarding unsupervised behaviours, i think if you are comfortable and happy, that is pretty good, are you able to talk to them openly, about how having the sense of freedom feels good/right for you?

From everything i have read from you in your posts through here, it sounds like you have a fairly good comprehension of yourself and when you are going well and when you need assistance.

I hope you can have a talk to them, and can maybe work out something that is win/win,

it's great that you decided to put your thoughts down, how have you been today?

Re: Moving, maybe?

I was a bit distressed about it yesterday as its a bit of a shock.

But today I can sort of see the sense of it a bit. I have fairly good handle on when I go off the rails and do seek help when I need it. Trouble is I am so far away from everything which I know bothers them.

I am never violent or into self harm so I cant really understand the issue of supervision.

Being happy in my environment is sort of number one for me. Also I dont know how I will go living in more civilsed circumstances. I rather like my crazy lifestyle even though my behaviour is a bit unpredictable.

Your right though I need to speak to my health team to see if I can come to a middle way but I have to wait untill wednesday to do that. I did feel a lot better though posting about it last night.

I wrote a long letter today to my psych and health team telling them what I think and putting my case which I think is the best way to go as I will forget some points if I have to say it to them.

I am quite ok now but I would be sad to leave where I live.

 

Thanks

Kenny

 

Re: Moving, maybe?

hey kenny,

I am glad you are feeling better about it today, it certainly would have been a shock, so that is completely understandable, it would be similar if they were to say to me, "you need to be hospitalised" i would rect very negatively against myself, because i don't think i need to be. just trying to use an example

 

I like how you have written a long letter as well, i think that will help to open up more conversation etc with your teams. and yeah i know all about forgetting some points if it is not written down, i always write stuff down before any of my appointments, helps jog my memory and makes sure i don't forget something important.

I think it is number 1 for everyone to be happy in there environment, i know i am living with my parent's it is certainly not my ideal place to be living at the moment, but it is safe and secure, i really want to be out on my own again though, less rules per say. But until i am a fair bit better, i am happy here.

It seems like you have had a good think on it, and i hope theyat you and your teams can work something out that is beneficial for you

if you can i would like to hear how you go when you see them, i understand if you don't want to 🙂

 

Re: Moving, maybe?

Dear @kenny66 

What an awful quandary. No wonder you are feeling troubled by this. It sounds to me (from your many posts on the subject over months) that you feel accepted and even valued for you as a part of your community. This is a very important factor in fostering wellness.

Another factor is physical environment. I know for me personally that being in the bush helps me to be more well. It is quieter, calmer and much more conducive of mindfulness rather than busyness. You seem to feel similarly? 

Whilst the tyranny of distance is a problem when you do need help you are fairly insightful and able to seek help when you need it, even if it is a fair way away. I wonder whether they have considered that having a more "controlled' environment (from their perspective) might actually precipitate the very thing you fear - becoming so unwell you need to be institutionalised. If this happened it would be a tragic mistake Woman Sad, for you and for everyone else who is gifted by your gentle and caring heart.

 

So well done for writing the letter. I hope they can hear and understand. It is your wellness they are supposed to be supporting, that is not necessarily improved by having a hospital or whatever in easy reach.

Hope for self-determination endures...

Kindest regards,

Kristin

@Rick my friend if you are up to it do you have any thoughts to add on Kenny's predicament?

Re: Moving, maybe?

Hey @kenny how are you travelling?

Were any decisions made about moving?

Re: Moving, maybe?

Hi Smiley Happy

Change is probably one of the worst things someone can go through. That sounds quite tough, but if you think it would benefit your hapiness~

I believe you will make the right choices, I have faith in you. Smiley Very Happy 

I'm probably not in the position to judge, or give professional advice.... Just remember don't do anything illegal or dangerous, and try your best to stay well.

Goodluck!

~NatilieMoon

 

Re: Moving, maybe?

Hi

Thanks NikNik I am cruising along fine for the moment. My psych and the mental health nice ladies and men read all I said and say they can understand what I am on about.

But the big issue is looking after myself with no one around.

They think my F/M is a stellar guy, as I do, but are a little concerned I dont overburden him with looking after me when he needs to look after his mental health as well, with his schizophrenia. 

So we all agreed that I am going to spend 2 days a week in the MHU to give him some respite, give me regular meals, and let them experiment on me as much as they like (just joking!!!.)  The other 5 days will be just be like now.

For now also the community nurse from the med faculty at the local uni, 10 minutes from my place, is going to do a daily call to check my medication and if I am ok.

My psych spoke to the local cops who have confirm that they have no problem coming if needed.

I sometimes forget to take my tabs and I forget to eat a bit so I need some strategies to deal with those things, but I will get on top of that.

The clinic would probably like me resident in house,so they can supervise the medication and food as well as being on the spot for any episodes. Anyway thats never going to happen.

So its a bit of a stitched up system which we all hope works.

 

Thanks

Kenny

 

 

 

 

 

Re: Moving, maybe?

Dearest @kenny66 

That sounds like a really good outcome. Well done for speaking up about this - I hope you are really pleased.

Big hugs! Heart

Kindest regards, 

Kristin

Re: Moving, maybe?

Hey Kenny,

I hope your traveling ok today.

Im wondering if you like to write lists to help you remember things?

I have a poor memory on a good day- so when im feeling over worked or stressed out it can be quite difficult for me unless i write posted notes for myself the day before and set alarms on my phone.

 

One day i recall having a huge head ache in the afternoon and not knowing why- i realised i had made myself so busy and pre occupied that i forgot to drink any water for the day- so i bought myself a big litre jug- i sit it on the kitchen bench so i have to walk past it all the time. lol and i have a note on the bathroom mirror reminding me to fill the jug.

 

I hope my little trick helps

Baboo

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