hello @Adge
occasionally our paths still cross during my brief periods on the forums.
I try to look out for who has posted and where.
impossible to keep up and in some cases wary of responding as not knowing updates and not wanting to upset or exacerbate any feelings..
I know that you have had physical health issues for some time now after multiple surgeries.
my sister has similar symptoms, yet different again..
I think that surgeons are reluctant to interfere with stitches externally for fear of setting off a chain reaction to the body not healing completely in that area.
I had something removed from my back where the wound although healed irritates at times..
I have since had something else cut out of my lower arm which after about a week became irritated and inflamed. It was then explained to me that it is not irritation but some people have reactions to surgery and their body rejects the stitching, in my case a small lump has evolved and irritates on and off. I was shown pictures that looked quite horrific where in some cases they appeared the size of balloons...
It was also explained to me that trying to rectify the reaction increases the body rejecting the surgery and worse results.
4 years is not a long time when grieving the loss of a loved one.
In fact I dont think that I personally can put a time on it...there will always be moments where I miss him immensely and yet on some occasions when he was alive he annoyed me...how human!
Today was sad we had to say goodbye to our 9 year old feline...even though I knew has been very emotional and numbing. husband not prepared even though I had discussed...he was fixated on a cure. she is at rest next to her adopted dad ( my soul fur baby). they are under a callistemon tree that is flowering...next to the cat play house where our one remaining cat will play alone hopefully...if not it will be turned into a nursery like an english garden potting shed...
her presence is everywhere in our home and he is quite confused as he would be..
it will take time but she is here with us ..so the three of them are still together in my mind from a physical body form...spiritually who knows..
I am going to mosaic one of her bowls..I have always intended to do something special in that corner of the garden for my big soul fur baby...the social distancing and perhaps lockdown will allow me to explore and be creative...
I am pleased to read that you enjoyed your birthday
the outings with other carers always include some who need to talk about their anxieties.
Are there any particular people in the group with whom you might be able to communicate still with via text or even talking on the mobile.
connection of some form is good.
you of course have your friends on here.
i shall try to find you when I do log on.
be gentle with yourself @Adge you have achieved far more than you give yourself credit for.
look back at where you first were when you arrived here and how far you have stretched out and friends made.
ps when I was in the UK in 2017 I was fascinated with animal shapes and figures.
I found three different birds carved from wood and painted all with a different facial pose and expression.
I then found in the national trust shop at one of the trust homes two metallic birds...they are superb..
I bought a curly steel sheep, a knitted rabbit, a stuffed cat, wooden fox, mouse and cat, a special edition painting of a gloucester pig and an antique repaired teddy bear...
what must people think?
who cares!!
If you were here I would show them to you.
Did I tell you when it heavily rained a few weeks ago, flooding in some parts of the city, the frogs arrived in droves...fabulous walking along hearing them croak..
there is so much to observe, hear and notice, I finally feel that I am home.
Sophia💚
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